my own evolution

"Whatever relationships you have attracted in your life at this moment, are precisely the ones you need in your life at this moment. There is a hidden meaning behind all events, and this hidden meaning is serving your own evolution.”
- Deepak Chopra

a revolutionary act

- 2007 mixed media on paper -

"In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act."

- George Orwell

telling the truth is a revolutionary act...

telling the truth...

the human experience

- 2013 watercolor on paper -

"We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are." - Anais Nin


Every person we come in contact with can be a mirror to various aspects of ourselves.

I don't believe in coincidence.  There is learning in every experience and in every encounter...

We are on this planet to fall in love with ourselves...with our true essence...

We are here to dance, to stretch, to open, to forgive, to love and to learn...

We are here to have the human experience, to FEEL...the pain, the pleasure and the WILD JOY...


from my journals

how deep is your love?

"I know your eyes in the morning sun.  I feel you touch me in the pouring rain, and the moment that you wander far from me, I wanna to feel you in my arms again.

And you come to me on a summer breeze.  Keep me warm in your love and then softly leave.  And it's me you need to show - how deep is your love?...cause we're living in a world of fools, breaking us down when they all should let us be.  We belong to you and me.

I believe in you.  You know the door to my very soul.  You're the light in my deepest, darkest hour.  You're my savior when I fall.  And you may not think I care for you, when you know down inside that I really do..." - The Bee Gees

wisdom of obscurity

- from one of my journals -

"Should you want to contain something,
you must deliberately let it expand.

Should you want to weaken something,
you must deliberately let it grow strong.

Should you want to eliminate something,
you must deliberately allow it to flourish.

Should you want to take something away,
you must deliberately grant it access.

The lesson here is called
the wisdom of obscurity.

The gentle outlasts the strong.

The obscure outlasts the obvious.

Fish cannot leave deep waters, and a country's weapons should not be displayed.

I seek out obscurity by suppressing any desires for attention or recognition."

- Living the Wisdom of the Tao by Dr. Wayne Dyer

el viento del olvido

- mixed media -

"Como a todas las muchachas del mundo,
también a Ella,
tejiéronla
con sus sueños,
los hombres que la amaban.

Y yo la amaba.

Pudo ser para otros un rostro 
que el Viento del Olvido 
borra a cada instante.
Pudo ser,
pero yo la amaba.

Yo veía las cosas más sencillas
volverse misteriosas
cuando Ella las tocaba.
Porque las estrellas de la noche
¡Ella con su mano las sembraba!

Los días de esmeralda,
los pájaros tranquilos,
los rocíos azules,
¡Ella los creaba!

Yo me emocionaba
con sólo verla pisar la hierba.

¡Ah si tus ojos me miraran todavía!

Esta noche no tendría tanta noche.
Esta noche la lluvia caería sin mojarme.

Porque la lluvia no empapa
a los que se pierden 
en el bosque de sus sueños relucientes,
y sus días no terminan
y son sus noches transparentes.

¿Dónde estás ahora?
¿En qué ciudad,
en qué penumbra,
en cuál bosque
te desconocen las luciérnagas?

Tal vez mientras escribo,
estás en un suburbio,
sola, inerme, abandonada...

¡Abandonada, no!

En tu ausencia
mi corazón todas las tardes muere."
- Manuel Scorza (1928-1983)

beach story

- circa 1970s -

The beach holds memories of sand castles and salty smiles. It is where I need to begin telling my story, telling her story...with Father Sun and Mother Moon...

excerpt from my journal

don't bring your lips so close - the kiss in your eyes

- mixed media on paper -

"All or nothing at all
Half a love never appealed to me
If your heart never could yield to me
Then I'd rather have nothing at all

All or nothing at all
If it's love there is no in between
Why begin, then cry
For something that might have been
No, I rather have nothing at all

But please, don't bring your lips so close to my cheek
Don't smile or I'll be lost beyond recall the kiss in your eyes
The touch of your hand makes me weak
And my heart may grow dizzy and fall

And if I fell under the spell of your call
I would be caught in the undertow
So you see, I've got to say no, no
All or nothing at all..." - Billie Holiday

...if it's love, there is no in between...

Sunday morning with Billie Holiday

whispery sensation pulsating

- do you trust your gut?  I do... -

"Learning to trust your instincts, using your intuitive sense of what's best for you, is paramount for any lasting success. I've trusted the still, small voice of intuition my entire life. And the only time I've made mistakes is when I didn't listen. 

It's really more of a feeling than a voice—a whispery sensation that pulsates just beneath the surface of your being. All animals have it. We're the only creatures that deny and ignore it. 

How many times have you gone against your gut, only to find yourself at odds with the natural flow of things? We all get caught up in the business of doing, and sometimes lose our place in the flow. But the more we can tune in to our intuition, the better off we are. I believe it's how God speaks to us. 

For all the major moves in my life—to Baltimore, to Chicago, to own my show, and to end it—I've trusted my instincts. I take in all the information I can gather. I listen to proposals, ideas, and advice. Then I go with my gut, what my heart feels most strongly. 

And I often tell friends: When you don't know what to do, do nothing. Get quiet so you can hear the still, small voice—your inner GPS guiding you to true North. " - OPRAH

we used to be closer than this

- from my journals -

"...It's hard to say.  

Separate or combine, I ask you one last time:

Did I hold you too tight?

Did I not let enough light in?

If a feeling appears, if your mind should sway,

It's not a secret you should keep,

I won't let you slip away.

We used to be closer than this...

We used to be closer than this...

Is it something you miss?

Winged or chained,

I ask you,

Would you have stayed?" - XX

when we meet again introduced as friends

- 2013 watercolor from A Thousand Kisses Deep series -

"...She takes just like a woman, yes she does...
She makes love just like a woman, yes she does...
And she aches just like a woman...
But she breaks just like a little girl...

When we meet again,
introduced as friends,
please don't let on that you knew me when,
I was hungry and it was your world...
Ah, you fake just like a woman, yes you do...
You make love just like a woman, yes you do...
Then you ache just like a woman...
But you break just like a little girl..."
- Bob Dylan

...watercolor meditations... 

for your soul to shake

"I will be waiting here

for your silence to break

for your soul to shake

for your love to wake." - RUMI

tu voz

- my shoulder -

"...I am like a scorched rock that suddenly sings when you are near, because it drinks the water you carry from the forest, in your voice."

"...soy como piedra quemada que de pronto, contigo, canta, porque recibe el agua de los bosques por tu voz conducida."

- Pablo Neruda

closer to ecstasy

- detail from watercolor on paper -

how do you pray?

when do you pray?

do you pray?

Today I went to mass, and although I encountered moments of reverence throughout the ceremony, my soul's prayers - my connection with the Divine - are more purely and more intensely felt elsewhere.  In nature.  In silence.  In dance.  In painting.  In yoga.  In sculpting.  In lovemaking.  In compassion.  In laughter.  In salty tears. In long embraces.

Today I sweat my prayers...

"To sweat is to pray, to make an offering of your innermost self.  Sweat is holy water, prayer beads, pearls of liquid that release your past.  Sweat is an ancient and universal form of self healing, whether done in the gym, the sauna, or the sweat lodge.  I do it on the dance floor.  The more you dance, the more you sweat.  The more you sweat, the more you pray.  The more you pray, the closer you come to ecstasy." - Gabrielle Roth

si he de vivir sin ti

"If I'm to live without you, let it be hard and bloody, cold soup, broken shoes, or in the midst of opulence let the dry branch of a cough jerk through me, barking your twisted name, the foaming vowels, and let the bedsheets stick to my fingers, and nothing give me peace. I won't learn to love you any better this way, but abandoned by happiness I'll know how much you gave me just by sometimes being around. I think I understand this, but I'm kidding myself: there'll need to be frost on the lintel so the one taking shelter in the vestibule feels the light in the dining room, the milky tablecloths, and the smell of bread passing its brown hand through the crack.

As far apart from you as one eye from the other, out of this affliction I've taken on, will be born the gaze that deserves you at last." - Julio Cortázar translated by Stephen Kessler

in the original Spanish version...

"Si he de vivir sin ti, que sea duro y cruento, la sopa fría, los zapatos rotos, o que en mitad de la opulencia se alce la rama seca de la tos, ladrandome tu nombre deformado, las vocales de espuma, y en los dedos se me peguen las sábanas, y nada me de paz. No aprenderé por eso a quererte mejor, pero desalojado de la felicidad sabre cuanto me debas con solamente a veces estar cerca. Esto creo entenderlo, pero me engaño: hará falta la escarcha del dintel para que el guarecido en el portal comprenda la luz del comedor, los manteles de leche, y el aroma del pan que pasa su morena mano por la hendija.

Tan lejos ya de ti como un ojo del otro, de esta asumida adversidad nacerá la mirada que por fin te merezca." - Julio Cortázar 

coral petals

I brought home coral petals as mementos of seven days by the sea...

refuse to stop kissing

"Because there's nothing more beautiful than the way the ocean refuses to stop kissing the shoreline, no matter how many times it's sent away." - Sarah Kay

mango on the beach

a threatening storm - 

sun - 

blue umbrellas - 

laughter - 

sweat - 

salty kisses - 

sacred waves -

flirtatious poses -

a Persian princess -

sips of coconut water - 

playfulness - 

hand in hand - 

a ripe juicy mango -

like water for chocolate kitchen - 

dance - 

heal - 

family - 

love -

and more laughter - 

...another mystical day...

karma

"How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours."

- Wayne Dyer

once upon a time I was a mermaid

...another blessed day by the sea wearing blue...