Samhain

- mixed media depicting dreams -

"Halloween is an ancient druidic holiday, one the Celtic peoples have celebrated for millennia. It is the crack between the last golden rays of summer and the dark of winter; the delicately balanced tweak of the year before it is given over entirely to the dark; a time for the souls of the departed to squint, to peek and perhaps to travel through the gap. What could be more thrilling and worthy of celebration than that? It is a time to celebrate sweet bounty, as the harvest is brought in. It is a time of excitement and pleasure for children before the dark sets in. We should all celebrate that." - Jenny Colgan

free - very good

"The free soul is rare, but you know it when you see it - basically because you feel good, very good, when you are near or with them." - Charles Bukowski 

shall I dance or shall I write?

shall I sculpt?

shall I laugh or shall I dream?

shall I paint or shall I meditate?

just be free, a voice of wisdom whispered, just be true to your soul...and feel good...

locamente enamorada

...de arboles...

my delicious love affair with trees continues...

intense obsessions

"Don't bend; don't water it down; don't try to make it logical; don't edit your own soul according to the fashion. Rather, follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly." - Franz Kafka

2014 mixed media on paper

beauty

simply surrender to the beauty in everyone...simply surrender to the beauty within...

snapshot of the afternoon sun shining through autumn trees today...

inspiration for a painting perhaps 

tempted by the fruit

- "Pomegranate Kiss" mixed media on paper circa 2007 -

Eve had the infamous apple

Persephone her pomegranate

...what is your fruit?

your temptation and pleasure?

"I said to my reflection,

let's get out of this place

...memories of it still

keep calling and calling

but forget  it all

I know I will

tempted by the fruit of another

tempted but the truth is discovered

what's been going on

now that you have gone

there's no other...

your body gets much closer

I fumble for the clock

alarmed by the seduction

I wish that it would stop

I bought a novel, some perfume

a fortune all for you

but it's not my conscience

that hates to be untrue

I asked my reflection

tell me what is there to do?

tempted by the fruit of another..." 

- Glenn Tilbrook and Chris Difford

my dreams with Pablo Picasso

- circa 2007, detail of mixed media on paper from my journals -

He began visiting my dreams in childhood, when I was about five or six years old.  I didn't recognize him at first and believed him to be an elf, an elemental, a gnome perhaps?

He brings me gifts - a flower, a fruit, a feather, a crystal...little things.  

He brings me ideas and challenges me to manifest the dreams into realities. 

"The meaning of life is to find your gift.
The purpose of life is to give it away."
- Pablo Picasso

una madurez deliciosamente mía

"La edad me esta recreando.

Un rostro desconocido empieza a aparecer sobre mi rostro.

Cada día, en vez de la semblanza a la que estoy habituada, otra mujer se asoma en el espejo y me mira desde una madurez que aún no reconozco como mia." - Gioconda Belli

mi alma no tiene edad...pero la edad me esta recreando con una madurez deliciosamente mía...

luna en completa oscuridad

"El amor en luna nueva,

es estar en el paraíso de la primavera,

es sentir besos dulces y excitantes.

Coronando su redondez,

luna en completa oscuridad,

es momento de ir más allá 

de cantos amorosos...

Unión de cuerpos

sin miedos, dejando atrás 

los temores infundados.

Espíritus divinos

en conjunción,

eternamente en comunión,

con deseos sublimados

en perennes cielos."

- Miguel Visurraga Sosa

images: studies for mixed media paintings on canvas 

ravaged - my two cents on Renee Zellweger

the fragrance, color and texture of a rose increase and intensify with time...as she opens up...

We are quick to judge. Some women choose to color and highlight their hair to hide the gray. Some women wear contact lenses. Other women decide to have their breasts lifted and enhanced, with undergarments and cosmetic surgeons. A lot of women whiten and straighten their teeth. Some women remove hair from their eyebrows, legs, underarms and bikini areas. Manicures and pedicures are very popular. I know a few women who decide to dress like their teenage daughters. Too many women are going around hungry, denying themselves in one way or another. We live in an image-oriented society that seems obsessed with aging...and we are quick to judge.

"One day, I was already old, in the entrance of a public place a man came up to me. He introduced himself and said:

 

I've known you for years. Everyone says you were beautiful when you were young, but I want to tell you I think you're more beautiful now than then. Rather than your face as a young woman, I prefer your face as it is now. Ravaged." 

- opening paragraph of "The Lover" by Marguerite Duras, translated from the French by Barbara Bray

I have watched a few of Renee Zellweger's films, but have not really followed her career. A lot of the photographs circulating social media feature an image of the actress from years ago next to a recent image. She seems thinner, with longer and darker hair and perhaps a bit of sunkissed skin. I would guess she decided to have excess eyelid skin surgically removed...a lot of men and women undergo blepharoplasty to correct drooping eyelids that encroach upon and interfere with one's field of vision...

"I'm glad folks think I look different. I'm living a happy, more fulfilling life, and I'm thrilled that perhaps it shows. My friends say that I look peaceful. I am healthy. For a long time I wasn't doing such a good job with that. I took on a schedule that is not realistically sustainable and didn't allow for taking care of myself. Rather than stopping to recalibrate, I kept running until I was depleted and made bad choices about how to conceal the exhaustion. I was aware of the chaos and finally chose different things."

- Renee Zewellger 

we're alone and I'm listening

 

"Tell me again, when I've been to the river and taken the edge off my thirst,

Tell me again, we're alone and I'm listening, I'm listening so hard that it hurts,

Tell me again, when I'm clean and I'm sober,

Tell me again, when I've seen through the horror,

Tell me again, tell me over and over,

Tell me you want me then, Amen...

...Tell me again that you know what I'm thinking...

Tell me again, tell me over and over,

Tell me you want me then, Amen."

- Leonard Cohen

Oscar de la Renta

"I always say this: live, love and laugh. A huge mistake we make is forgetting that one day we will die. We think that we are going to live forever. I always say life is like a garden. There is a time to plant, then a time you have to weed. Just think about people you've deeply cared for. And think about the people you wish you'd spent more time with. Or about the things you had loved and whether you'd given enough time to them...For me it's so much easier to love than to hate."

- Oscar de la Renta (1932-2014)

kissing the rainbow

stretching...

breathing...

I found a rainbow on my ceiling...

my feet reached up to kiss the light...

unedited snapshots from my morning yoga

free as the wind in my world of lovers

- 2013 mixed media from my journals -

My heart is burning with love

All can see this flame 

My heart is pulsing with passion 

like waves on an ocean 

My friends have become strangers 

and I'm surrounded by enemies 

But I'm free as the wind 

no longer hurt by those who reproach me 

I'm at home wherever I am 

and in the room of lovers 

I can see with closed eyes 

the beauty that dances 

Behind the veils

intoxicated with love

I too dance the rhythm

of this moving world

I have lost my senses

in my world of lovers

- RUMI

on the floor on the ground

what I wanted...

what I needed...

an evening of art and music...

Zola Jesus reminds me:

"...you never were the one...

and then I lay here open,

on the floor,

on the ground,

on the stairs,

on the way,

...and it's dangerous to go and listen to what they say...

the way you hold yourself straight,

you were never innocent,

and I just lay here frozen,

curious..." - Zola Jesus

ageless

"I'm happy to report that my inner child is still ageless." - James Broughton

ageless souls...you and I...

upon her perfect lips

- my unedited lips on paper -

"A man had given all other bliss,

And all his worldly work for this,

To waste his whole heart in one kiss,

Upon her perfect lips."

-Alfred Lord Tennyson (1809-1892)

xo xo xo

se me olvidó que te olvidé

- my shoulder -

"Yo te recuerdo cariño, 
mucho fuiste para mí, 
siempre te llamé mi encanto, 
siempre te llamé mi vida, 
hoy tu nombre se me olvida. 

Se me olvidó que te olvidé, 
se me olvidó que te dejé 
lejos muy lejos de mi vida. 
Se me olvidó que ya no estás, 
que ya ni me recordarás, 
y me volvió a sangrar la herida. 

Se me olvidó que te olvidé 
y como nunca te lloré 
entre las sombras escondida, 
la verdad no sé porqué 
se me olvidó que te olvidé 
a mí que nada se me olvida."
-Lolita de la Colina

why do we waste time hiding it all inside?

- 2014 mixed media -

"We bide our time, though the time is fine.

Oh, to be there, I could be there, say you'll be there.

You know the way, I can't resist you. I said to myself I'd try. 

Why do we waste time hiding it all inside?

I want you to be mine...

I wished you'd been there,

I needed you there...

I won't believe it, till I can feel it, can you feel it?..."

-Oliver Sim & Romy Madley Croft

Papa-Coco

today he would be 101 years old...

my beloved grandfather...

achieve liftoff

"Birds don't brag about flying the way we do. They don't write books about it and then give workshops. They don't take on disciples and spoil their own air time. Who would dance and achieve liftoff with a bunch of wackos tugging on you?"

- Tukaram 

truth is one, paths are many

clarity...peace...gratitude...

my day began with a majestic sunrise, followed by a refreshing, blessed rain...

inspiration...forgiveness...compassion...

surrender

...to live life with nobility, grace and elegance...

2010 photograph of my son holding one of my wearable sculptures

full moon in libra

mother moon blesses in all her fullness...

the man who can thrill

- mixed media on paper in a private collection -

“The real lover is the man who can thrill you by kissing your forehead or smiling into your eyes or just staring into space.” 
- Marilyn Monroe

cuando mas te quiero

- mixed media from my journals -

"Cuando ya nada pido

y casi nada espero

y apenas puedo nada

es cuando mas te quiero."

- Jose Coronel Urtecho

simply irresistible

- mixed media from my journals -

"How can it be permissible?
She comprise my principle - that kind of love is mythical.
She's anything but typical.
She's a craze you'd endorse.
She's a powerful force you're obliged to conform when there's no other course.

She used to look good to me, but now I find her,
simply irresistible...

Her loving is so powerful,
it's simply unavoidable.

The trend is irreversible.

The woman is invincible.

She's a natural law and she leaves me in awe.

She deserves the applause, I surrender because
she used to look good to me, but now I find her,
simply irresistible...

She's unavoidable, I'm backed against the wall.
She gives me feelings like I never felt before.
I'm breaking promises, she's breaking every law...

Her methods are inscrutable.
The proof is irrefutable...
She's so completely kissable.
Our lives are indivisible...

simply irresistible, she's all mine, there's no other way to go...
simply irresistible..."

- Robert Palmer (1949-2003)


I like to imagine this song was written for me...

quince mil encantos

- 2013 mixed media from series -

"entre el cielo y el suelo hay algo,
con tendencia a quedarse calvo,
de tanto recordar,
y ese algo que soy yo mismo,
es un cuadro de bifrontismo,
que sólo da una faz,

la cara vista es un anuncio de signal,
la cara oculta es la resulta,
de mi idea genial de echarte,
me cuesta tanto olvidarte,
me cuesta tanto,

olvidar quince mil encantos es
mucha sensatez
y no sé si seré sensato
lo que sé es que me cuesta un rato
hacer las cosas sin querer

y aunque fui yo quien decidió
que ya no más
y no me cansé se jurarte
que no habrá segunda parte
me cuesta tanto olvidarte
me cuesta tanto..." - José M. Cano

finding the essence of who you are

- a corner of my desk -

"Many things in your life matter, but only one thing matters absolutely.

It matters whether you succeed or fail in the eyes of the world. It matters whether you are healthy or not healthy, whether you are educated or not educated. It matters whether you are rich or poor - it certainly makes a difference in your life.  Yes, all these things matter, RELATIVELY speaking, but they don't matter ABSOLUTELY.

There is something that matters more than any of those things and that is FINDING the ESSENCE of WHO you ARE beyond that short-lived entity, that short-lived personalized sense of self.

You find peace not by rearranging the circumstances of your life, but by realizing who you are at the DEEPEST level.

Reincarnation doesn't help you if in your next incarnation you still don't know who you are.

All the misery on the planet arises due to a personalized sense of 'me' or 'us.' That covers up the essence of who you are.  When you are unaware of the inner essence, in the end you always create misery.  It's as simple as that. When you don't know who you are, you create a mind-made self as a substitute for your beautiful divine being and cling to that fearful and needy self.

Protecting and enhancing that false sense of self then becomes your primary motivating force...For most things in life, you need TIME: to learn a new skill, build a house, become an expert, make a cup of tea...Time is useless, however, for the most essential thing in life, the one thing that really matters: self-realization, which means knowing who you are beyond the surface self - beyond your name, your physical form, your history, your story.

You cannot find yourself in the past of future. The only place where you can find yourself is in the Now.

Spiritual seekers look for self-realization or enlightenment in the future. To be a seeker implies that you need the future. If this is what you believe, it becomes true for you: you will need time until you realize that you don't need time to be who you are.

...By knowing yourself as the awareness in which phenomenal existence happens, you become free of dependency on phenomena and free of self-seeking in situations, places, and conditions. In other words: what happens or doesn't happen is not that important anymore. Things lose their heaviness, their seriousness. A playfulness comes into your life. You recognize this world as a cosmic dance, the dance of form - no more and no less.

When you know who you truly are, there is an abiding alive sense of peace. You could call it joy because that's what joy is: vibrantly alive peace. It is the joy of knowing yourself as the very life essence before life takes on form. That is the joy of Being - of being who you truly are."

- Eckhart Tolle

El Poeta Carpintero - Raúl Xavier García

- my dear friend modeling one of my sculptures -

Déjame hablar contigo

-- Por Raúl Xavier García

-- A Julia Casimira Sacasa


Esa inquietud. Esta necesidad de saber

lo que no es tuyo ni mío,

es lo que te obliga a obedecer:

nos lleva desprotegido hacia el peligro.

Más tarde, con los golpes que te da la vida,

con ellos puedes empezar a comprender

y medir distancias, si caminar sobre el mar

o en las brasas del fuego.

Y en la serenidad te niegas a sí mismo,

sería como huir sin esperar, amar sin ser herida.

Y mañana correr la sangre en abundancia

no así, el asma.

alone with you

- detail from one of my journals -

"Whenever I'm alone with you 
You make me feel like I am home again 
Whenever I'm alone with you 
You make me feel like I am whole again 

Whenever I'm alone with you 
You make me feel like I am young again 
Whenever I'm alone with you 
You make me feel like I am fun again 

However far away
I will always love you
However long I stay
I will always love you
Whatever words I say
I will always love you
I will always love you

Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am free again
Whenever I'm alone with you
You make me feel like I am clean again

However far away
I will always love you..." - THE CURE