tell the truth now

- 2013 mixed media on paper -

"Do I move you?  Are you willing?
Do I groove you?  Is it thrilling?
Do I soothe you?  Tell the truth now,
Do I move you?  Are you loose now?
The answer better be - YES, yes...it pleases me.

Are you ready for this action?
Does it give you satisfaction?
Are you hip to what I'm saying?
If you are then let's start swaying.
The answer better be - YES, yes...it pleases me.

When I touch you, do you quiver?
From your head down to your liver?
If you like it let me know it...
Don't be psychic or you'll blow it...
The answer better be - YES, yes...that pleases me."
- Nina Simone

the touch of your hand makes my pulse react

"You must understand though the touch of your hand makes my pulse react.

That it's only the thrill of boy meeting girl, opposites attract.

It's physical.

Only logical.

You must try to ignore that it means more than that.

What's love got to do, got to do with it?

What's love but a second hand emotion?

What's love got to do, got to do with it?

Who needs a heart when a heart can be broken?

It may seem to you that I'm acting confused when you're close to me.

If I tend to look dazed I've read it someplace, I've got cause to be.

There's a name for it.
There's a phrase that fits.

But whatever the reason you do it for me...

I've been taking on a new direction, but I have to say.

I've been thinking about my own protection; it scares me to feel this way..."

- as sung by Tina

I am in an 80s mood...a dancing mood...

pretending

- 2013 watercolor from the series titled "A Thousand Kisses Deep" -

"I saw you last night at the gathering,

but could not take you openly in my arms,

so I put my lips next to your cheek,

pretending to talk privately." - RUMI

three years old

"I see who you are

behind the skin

and the muscles

I see who you are, now

and when you get older later

I will see the same girl

the same soul

lioness, fire-heart

passionate lover

and afterwards

later this century

when you and I have become corpes

let's celebrate now all this flesh on our bones

let me push you up against me tightly

and enjoy every bit of you

I see who you are..."

- Bjork

selfie with my wild and wonderful daughter who is reminding me of my wildness and wonder, my essence ...happy third birthday my darling

unfathomable grace of the face

- what is on your desk? -

From the beginning of my life

I have been looking for your face

but today I have seen it

Today I have seen

the charm, the beauty,

the unfathomable grace

of the face

that I was looking for

Today I have found you

and those who laughed

and scorned me yesterday

are sorry that they were not looking

as I did

I am bewildered by the magnificence

of your beauty

and wish to see you

with a hundred eyes

My heart has burned with passion

and has searched forever

for this wondrous beauty

that I now behold

I am ashamed

to call this love human

and afraid of God

to call it divine

Your fragrant breath

like the morning breeze

has come to the stillness of the garden

You have breathed new life into me

I have become your sunshine

and also your shadow

My soul is screaming in ecstasy

Every fiber of my being

is in love with you

Your effulgence

has lit a fire in my heart

and you have made radiant

for me

the earth and sky

My arrow of love

has arrived at the target

I am in the house of mercy

and my heart

is a place of prayer

- RUMI

I begin my days with poetry and prayer, meditation and yoga...

teach me my dear

"Teach me to sin - 

In love's forbidden ways,
For you can make all passion pure;
The magic lure of your sweet eyes
Each shape of sin makes virtue praise.

Teach me to sin -
Enslave me to your wanton charms,
Crush me in your velvet arms
And make me, make me love you.
Make me fire your blood with new desire,
And make me kiss you - lip and limb,
Till sense reel and pulses swim.
Aye! even if you hate me,
Teach me to sin."

- Alfred Bryan (1871-1958)

to have as a friend

"How nice, I remember thinking. It will be so much fun to have Barry as a friend. I certainly didn't think we were going to fall in love...

Our relationship was unique from day one and quite unexplainable...I was overwhelmed by the way he loved me...gave into me, trusted me blindly, and loved me unconditionally...Never, ever, even for a second, under any circumstances, has he not been there for me. And that's pretty amazing. 

There was passion between us; love, support, honesty. There was never anything forced between us...the way he loves me is true and unique."

- Diane Von Furstenberg

detail from painted silk, circa 2003 or 2004

just like a woman

"...She takes just like a woman, yes she does...

She makes love just like a woman, yes she does...

And she aches just like a woman...

But she breaks just like a little girl...

When we meet again,

introduced as friends,

please don't let on that you knew me when, I was hungry and it was your world...

Ah, you fake just like a woman, yes you do...

You make love just like a woman, yes you do...

Then you ache just like a woman...

But you break just like a little girl..."

- Bob Dylan

 

in the middle of a dream

"six o'clock already,
I was just in the middle of a dream,

I was kissing Valentino,

by a crystal blue Italian stream...

it's just another manic Monday,
I wish it was Sunday,
'cause that's my fun day,
my I don't have to run day,
it's just another manic Monday...

all of the nights,
why did my lover have to pick last night,
to get down...
he tells me in his bedroom voice:
come on honey, let's go make some noise...

time it goes so fast,
when you're having fun...
it's just another manic Monday..." - The Bangles

I am learning to love my early Monday mornings - they hold infinite potential for the week ahead...

huevon, huevona...

Easter Sunday greetings amidst vintage images that intrigue me...

true story

"Io lavoro e penso a te,
torno a casa e penso a te,
le telefono e intanto penso a te...

Come stai e penso a te,
dove andiamo e penso a te,
le sorrido abbasso gli occhi e penso a te...

Non so con chi adesso sei,
non so che cosa fai,
ma so di certo a cosa stai pensando...

E' troppo grande la città,
per due che come noi,
non sperano però si stan cercando... cercando...

Scusa è tardi e penso a te,
ti accompagno e penso a te,
non son stato divertente e penso a te...

Sono al buio e penso a te,
chiudo gli occhi e penso a te,
io non dormo e penso a te..."

- Lucio Battisti (1943-1998)

full moon blessing

"Both the yogi and the shaman do away with their past and with the ties that keep them bound to their karmic and family histories. They also learn to break free of time to taste infinity; and in doing so, reach an unconditioned, natural state where they recover their original Self."

- Alberto Villoldo

full moon blessings

bajo luna llena

"Tiene la expresión de una flor,
la voz de un pájaro,
y el alma como luna llena,
de un mes de abril...

Tiene en sus palabras calor,
y frío de invierno,
su piel es dura como el árbol,
que azota el viento...

Y tiene el corazón de poeta,
de niño grande y de hombre niño,
capaz de amar con delirio,
capaz de hundirse en la tristeza...

El tiene, el corazón de poeta,
de vagabundo y de mendigo,
y así lo he conocido,
y así me gusta a mi que sea,
que tenga el corazón de poeta...

Tiene la arrogancia del sol,
mirada cándida,
su piel de nieve se hace fuego cerca de mi...

Es amigo y amante fiel,
ve las estrellas,
camina junto a mi soñando,
con cosas bellas...

Y tiene el corazón de poeta,
de niño grande y de hombre niño,
capaz de amar con delirio,
capaz de hundirse en la tristeza...

El tiene, el corazón de poeta,
de vagabundo y de mendigo,
y así lo he conocido
y así me gusta a mi que sea,
que tenga el corazón de poeta..." - JEANETTE

una rosa es una rosa

"Es por culpa de una hembra 
que me estoy volviendo loco.
No puedo vivir sin ella,
pero con ella tampoco.

Y si de este mal de amores -
yo me fuera pa' la tumba,
a mi no me mandeis flores,
que como dice esta rumba:

Quise cortar la flor
mas tierna del rosal,
pensando que de amor
no me podria pinchar,
y mientras me pinchaba
me enseño una cosa
que una rosa es una rosa es una rosa...

Y cuando abri la mano
y la deje caer
rompieron a sangrar
las llagas en mi piel
y con sus petalos
me las curo mimosa
que una rosa es una rosa es una rosa...

Pero cuanto mas me cura,
al ratito mas me escuece,
porque amar es el empiece
de la palabra amargura.

Una mentira y un credo
por cada espina del tallo
que injertandose en los dedos
una rosa es un rosario..."
- J.M. Cano

amanecí muy Española...olé...
y que ponte los zapatos de tacón y taconea...

I woke up with this song in my mind...
Spanish dreams perhaps...

still

"Often we long for another person because, in an invisible, intangible realm, we're still communicating, still connecting, still seeking resolution...

...there was a time when widows wore weeds for a year; grief was understood, acknowledged, validated. It's not neurotic to grieve a relationship; what's neurotic is when we don't. On some level, no matter how disassociated from our feelings we might be, every relationship brings hope - hope that this might be a safe place, a haven, a rest after all our battles.

When a relationship doesn't work out, for whatever reason, our disappointment is natural. Every intense encounter represents a deep and complicated KARMIC connection. An ending of a relationship is much like a death, and in many cases the sadness is even greater. When someone has died, there has often been completion and understanding that doesn't occur when both people are alive but have separated without higher awareness. Perhaps the one we love is simply on the other side of town now, sleeping with someone else, yet they are really universes away since the resolution we so crave has not occurred. There's no need to pretend this isn't a knife to the heart. It is, and there's nothing to do but cry the tears that gush forth like blood from a wound...

...It takes great courage and personal strength to hold on to our center during times of great hurt. It takes wisdom to understand that our reactiveness only fans the flames of FALSE DRAMA. Love creates a mystical shield around us, protecting us from chaos...TRUTH can never be destroyed."

- Marianne Williamson

lover

"Did I disappoint you or let you down?

Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I've kissed your lips and held your hand.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
I am a dreamer and when I wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bare my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow..."

- Sacha Skarbek, sung by James Blunt 

perdiendo el tiempo

"Siempre que te pregunto,
Que cuando como y donde,
Tu siempre me respondes;
Quizas, quizas, quizas.

Y asi pasan los dias,
Y yo desesperando,
Y tu, tu contestando;
Quizas, quizas, quizas.

Estas perdiendo el tiempo,
Pensando, pensando,
Por lo que mas tu quieras,
Hasta cuando, hasta cuando?

Y asi pasan los dias,
Y yo desesperando,
Y tu, tu contestando;
Quizas, quizas, quizas."

- Osvaldo Farres

snapshot: Cleopatra marble carving by William Wetmore Story (1819-1895)

curvature

"it's a lip thing with you.

the first time we met i could not

take my eyes off them.

you probably thought you had something 

in your teeth with the way i was staring.

i know their curvature like the reminiscent

smell of my mother.

give me a photograph of every mouth in the

world and i will pick yours out without question.

i do not have a religion but if i did it

would be them...

...they are what roses and mountains and oceans

could only hope to be.

with you it's a lip thing.

and then it became a heart thing.

and then soul.

and then all."

- Christopher Poindexter

still craving your kiss

"Stars shining bright above you,

Night breezes seem to whisper "I love you"

Birds singing in the sycamore tree,
Dream a little dream of me.

Say "Night-ie night" and kiss me,

Just hold me tight and tell me you'll miss me.

While I'm alone and blue as can be,

Dream a little dream of me.

Stars fading, but I linger on, dear
Still craving your kiss
I'm longing to linger till dawn, dear
Just saying this

Sweet dreams till sunbeams find you
Sweet dreams that leave all worries behind you
But in your dreams whatever they be
Dream a little dream of me

Stars fading, but I linger on, dear
Still craving your kiss
I'm longing to linger till dawn, dear
Just saying this

Sweet dreams till sunbeams find you
Sweet dreams that leave all worries far behind you
But in your dreams whatever they be
Dream a little dream of me.."

Songwriters: Fabian Andre, Gus Kahn, and Wilbur Schwandt

I have this song on my mind tonight...

the tune without words

"Hope is the thing with feathers -

That perches in the soul -

And sings the tune without the words -

And never stops - at all -

And sweetest - in the Gale - is heard -

And sore must be the storm -

That could abash the little Bird

That kept so many warm -

I’ve heard it in the chillest land -

And on the strangest Sea -

Yet - never - in Extremity,

It asked a crumb - of me."

- Emily Dickinson

detail of mixed media collage on paper 

an irresistible force such as you

- 2013 mixed media on paper -

When an irresistible force such as you
Meets and old immovable object like me
You can bet as sure as you live

Something's gotta give
Something's gotta give
Something's gotta give

When an irrepressible smile such as yours
Warms an old implacable heart such as mine
Don't say no because I insist

Somewhere, somehow
Someone's gonna be kissed

So En Garde who knows what the fates have in store
From their vast mysterious sky?
I'll try hard ignoring those lips I adore
But how long can anyone try?

Fight, fight, fight, fight, fight it with all of our might
Chances are some heavenly star spangled night
We'll find out as sure as we live

Something's gotta give
Something's gotta give
Something's gotta give

-  original music and lyrics by Johnny Mercer, sung by Ella Fitzgerald

I woke up with this song in my heart...and lots of colors in my soul...

my breath

"Every time I think of you -

I always catch my breath 

And I'm still standing here 

And you're miles away 

And I'm wondering why you left

And there's a storm that's raging

Through my frozen heart tonight

I hear your name in certain circles

And it always makes me smile

I spend my time

Thinking about you

And it's almost driving me wild

And there's a heart that's breaking

Down this long distance line tonight

I ain't missing you at all

Since you've been gone away

I ain't missing you

No matter what I might say

There's a message in the wire

And I'm sending you this signal tonight

You don't know

How desperate I've become

And it looks like I'm losing this fight

In your world

I have no meaning

Though I'm trying hard to understand

And it's my heart that's breaking

Down this long distance line tonight

I ain't missing you at all

Since you've been gone away

I ain't missing you

No matter what my friends say

And there's a message that I'm sending out

Like a telegraph to your soul

And if I can't bridge this distance

Stop this heartbreak overload

I ain't missing you at all

Since you've been gone away

I ain't missing you

No matter what my friends say

I ain't missing you

I ain't missing you

I can lie to myself

And there's a storm that's raging

Through my frozen heart tonight

I ain't missing you at all

Since you've been gone away

I ain't missing you

No matter what my friends say

Ain't missing you

I ain't missing you

I ain't missing you

I can lie to myself

Ain't missing you...

No matter what my friends might say

I ain't missing you..."

- John Waite