willing to risk it all

"Do you love me, or are you just extending goodwill?

Do you need me half as bad as you say, or are you just feeling guilt?

I’ve been burned before

and I know the score

So you won’t hear me complain

Will I be able to count on you?

Or is your love in vain?

Are you so fast that you cannot see that I must have solitude?

When I am in the darkness, why do you intrude?

Do you know my world, do you know my kind?

Or must I explain?

Will you let me be myself?

Or is your love in vain?

Well I’ve been to the mountain and I’ve been in the wind

I’ve been in and out of happiness

I have dined with kings, I’ve been offered wings and I’ve never been too impressed

All right, I’ll take a chance, 

I will fall in love with you

If I’m a fool you can have the night,

you can have the morning too

Can you cook and sew, 

make flowers grow?

Do you understand my pain?

Are you willing to risk it all
Or is your love in vain?"

- Bob Dylan

to make you feel my love

"When the rain is blowing in your face,

And the whole world is on your case,

I could offer you a warm embrace,

To make you feel my love.

When the evening shadows and the stars appear,

And there is no one there to dry your tears,

I could hold you for a million years

To make you feel my love.

I know you haven't made your mind up yet, but I will never do you wrong.

I've known it from the moment that we met, no doubt in my mind where you belong.

I'd go hungry; I'd go black and blue,

And I'd go crawling down the avenue.

No, there's nothing that I wouldn't do

To make you feel my love.

The storms are raging on the rolling sea

And on the highway of regret.

The winds of change are blowing wild and free,

You ain't seen nothing like me yet.

I could make you happy, make your dreams come true.

Nothing that I wouldn't do.

Go to the ends of the Earth for you,

To make you feel my love..."

- Bob Dylan 

finge que no te gusto

Ya quiéreme de a poco

Pero que no me de cuenta y que nadie sepa

Ven, y cuídame

Pero que parezca que me estas haciendo daño

Amárrame… 

Ay, finge que no te gusto

Dame una mirada y luego vuélvete lejana

Y sin querer búscame y déjame

Llámame pero no me hables, besame y ahogame

Amárrame… 

Curarme…

Y enfermaré de a poco, poco, poco

Curame…

Trasformame un loco poco poco

Amárrame… 

Ay, quiero ver tu perversión

Hasta donde llega, hasta donde me has llevado

Ignorame, ven y pierde la razón

Quiero que me ruegues y me mires a los ojos 

Dame la espalda, desenfocame

Tómame del pelo y repiteme mi nombre

Y ámame, pero sin querer

Deja que te lleve que mañana acaba todo

Amárrame… 

Curame…

Y enfermaré de a poco, poco, poco

Curame…

Trasformame un loco poco poco

Amárrame… 

Curame…

Y enfermaré de a poco, poco, poco

Curame…

Trasformame un loco poco poco

Amárrame…

- Mon Laferte and Juanes

wisdom is sweeter

"Wisdom is
sweeter than honey,
brings more joy
than wine,
illumines
more than the sun,
is more precious
than jewels.

She causes
the ears to hear
and the heart to comprehend.

I love her
like a mother,
and she embraces me
as her own child.

I will follow
her footprints
and she will not cast me away."

- Makeda, Queen of Sheba 

silence

"Contain your experience with the Divine so that it does not escape you but rather shapes you. 

Be silent. 

Silence will help you avoid engaging in the games of competition and illusion that regularly seduce us in the outside world. Silence also helps you avoid distraction. It helps focus the busy mind - the mind that always has to be doing something, thinking something, the mind that always has to be otherwise engaged lest it become introspective and allow the soul’s voice to override its own. 

The silence I am describing is a silence that you use to contain the grace you receive when you enter the Castle of your soul. This quality of silence allows you to engage in discernment. 

You carry this silence within you, even when you are with others. It allows you to hold your center amid the chaos of your life; it keeps you clear so that you do not do or say things you will regret or make decisions out of fear. “

- Caroline Myss

no se atrevía

“To him she seemed so beautiful, so seductive, so different from ordinary people, that he could not understand why no one was as disturbed as he by the clicking of her heels on the paving stones, why no one else's heart was wild with the breeze stirred by the sighs of her veils, why everyone did not go mad with the movements of her braid, the flight of her hands, the gold of her laughter. He had not missed a single one of her gestures, not one of the indications of her character, but he did not dare approach her for fear of destroying the spell.” 

“Le parecía tan bella, tan seductora, tan distinta de la gente común, que no entendía por qué nadie se trastornaba como él con las castañuelas de sus tacones en los adoquines de la calle, ni se le desordenaba el corazón con el aire de los suspiros de sus volantes, ni se volvía loco de amor todo el mundo con los vientos de su trenza, el vuelo de sus manos, el oro de su risa. No había perdido un gesto suyo, ni un indicio de su carácter, pero no se atrevía a acercársele por el temor de malograr el encanto."

- Gabriel Garcia Marquez (1927-2014)

snapshot - an unintentional selfie of my shoulder...

para que nunca haya malentendidos

"Para que nunca haya malentendidos

para que nada se interponga
voy a explicarte lo que mi amor convoca

tus ojos que se caen de desconcierto
y otras veces se alzan penetrantes y tibios
tienen tanta importancia que yo mismo me asombro

tus lindas manos mágicas
que te expresan a veces mejor que las palabras
tan importantes son que no oso tocarlas

y si un día las toco es solamente
para retransmitirte ciertas claves

tu cuerpo pendular
que duda en recibirse o entregarse
y es tan joven que enseña a pesar tuyo
es un dato del cual me faltan datos
y sin embargo ayudo a conocerlo

tus labios puestos en el entusiasmo
que dibuja palabras y promete promesas
son en tu imagen para mí los héroes
y son también el ángel enemigo

en mi amor estás toda o casi toda
me faltan cifras pero las calculo
faltan indicios pero los descubro

sin embargo en mi amor hay otras cosas
por ejemplo los sueños con que muevo la tierra
la pobre lucha que libré y libramos
los buenos odios esos que ennoblecen
el diálogo constante con mi gente
la pregunta punzante que me hicieron
las respuestas veraces que no di

en mi amor hay también corajes varios
y un miedo que a menudo los resume
hay hombres como yo que miran tras las rejas
a una muchacha que podrías ser vos

en mi amor hay faena y hay descanso
sencillas recompensas y complejos castigos
hay dos o tres mujeres que forman tu prehistoria
y hay muchos años demasiados años
de inventar alegrías y creerlas
después a pie juntillas

querría que en mi amor vieras todo eso
y que vos muchachita
con paciencia y cautela
sin herirme ni herirte
rescataras de allí la luna el río
los emblemas rituales
los proyectos de besos o de adioses
el corazón que aguarda pese a todo."

- Mario Benedetti 

a picture of you

"I found a picture of you,

What hijacked my world that night,

To a place in the past,

We've been cast out of ?

Now we're back in the fight,

We're back on the train,

Oh, back on the chain gang

A circumstance beyond our control,

The phone, the TV and the news of the world,

Got in the house like a pigeon from hell,

Threw sand in our eyes and descended like flies,

Put us back on the train

Oh, back on the chain gang

The powers that be

That force us to live like we do 

Bring me to my knees 

When I see what they've done to you 

But I'll die as I stand here today 

Knowing that deep in my heart 

They'll fall to ruin one day 

For making us part

I found a picture of you, oh oh oh oh 

Those were the happiest days of my life 

Like a break in the battle was your part, oh oh oh oh 

In the wretched life of a lonely heart 

Now we're back on the train 

Oh, back on the chain gang..."

- The Pretenders

las aguas de mis pensamientos.

"Hay almas que tienen
azules luceros,
mañanas marchitas
entre hojas del tiempo,
y castos rincones
que guardan un viejo
rumor de nostalgias
y sueños.

Otras almas tienen
dolientes espectros
de pasiones. Frutas
con gusanos. Ecos
de una voz quemada
que viene de lejos
como una corriente
de sombra. Recuerdos
vacíos de llanto
y migajas de besos.
Mi alma está madura
hace mucho tiempo,
y se desmorona
turbia de misterio.
Piedras juveniles
roídas de ensueño
caen sobre las aguas
de mis pensamientos.
Cada piedra dice:
“¡Dios está muy lejos!”

- Federico García Lorca (1898-1936)

tigers and strawberries

- mixed media on paper from my journals -

“There is a story of a woman running away from tigers. She runs and runs and the tigers are getting closer and closer. When she comes to the edge of a cliff, she sees some vines there, so she climbs down and holds on to the vines. Looking down, she sees that there are tigers below her as well. She then notices that a mouse is gnawing away at the vine to which she is clinging. She also sees a beautiful little bunch of strawberries close to her, growing out of a clump of grass. She looks up and she looks down. She looks at the mouse. Then she just takes a strawberry, puts it in her mouth, and enjoys it thoroughly. Tigers above, tigers below. This is actually the predicament that we are always in, in terms of our birth and death. Each moment is just what it is. It might be the only moment of our life; it might be the only strawberry we’ll ever eat. We could get depressed about it, or we could finally appreciate it and delight in the preciousness of every single moment of our life.” 
― Pema Chödrön

tigers and strawberries my dear...

mixed media on paper

make you notice

"...Intention I feel inventive,

Gonna make you, make you, make you notice -

Got motion restrained emotion...

No reason just seems so pleasing,

Gonna make you, make you, make you notice -

Gonna use my arms,

Gonna use my legs,

Gonna use my style,

Gonna use my sidestep,

Gonna use my fingers,

Gonna use my, my, my imagination -

'Cause I gonna make you see,

There's nobody else here,

No one like me,

I'm special so special,

I gotta have some of your attention give it to me -

Got rhythm I can't miss a beat...

Got something I'm winking at you,

Gonna make you, make you, make you notice...Give it to me..."

- The Pretenders

in an 80s mood

again

"You and I will meet again -

When we're least expecting it -

One day in some far off place -

I will recognize your face -

I won't say goodbye my friend -

For you and I will meet again."

- Tom Petty (1950-2017)

squeezing drops

- 2013 mixed media on canvas from a series exploring painting as poetry and meditation -

"Keep squeezing drops of the Sun

from your prayers and work and music

and from your companion's beautiful laughter.

Keep squeezing drops of the Sun -

from the sacred hands and glance of your Beloved

and, my dear,

from the most insignificant movements

of your own holy body."

- HAFIZ

tu amor me condena a la dulce pena de sufrir

"Ay, Rosa, Rosa tan maravillosa 

como blanca diosa, 

como flor hermosa 

tu amor me condena 

a la dulce pena de sufrir... 

Ay, Rosa, Rosa dame de tu boca 

esa furia loca 

que mi amor provoca 

que me causa llanto 

por quererte tanto, 

sólo a ti. 

Ay, Rosa, Rosa eres orgullosa 

y sin contemplarme 

tu fe se destroza 

mientras tanto yo 

agonizo por ti, ay! 

Ay, Rosa dame todos tus sueños 

dueño de tu amor quiero ser 

ay, dame de tu ayer las heridas 

vida, junto a mí has de tener, ay! 

Ay, Rosa, Rosa eres orgullosa 

y sin contemplarme 

tu fe se destroza 

mientras tanto yo 

agonizo por ti, ay! 

Ay, Rosa, Rosa pide lo que quieras 

pero nunca pidas 

que mi amor se muera 

si algo ha de morir, 

moriré yo por ti. 

Ay, Rosa! Ay, Rosa!"

- SANDRO

sueños

soñé contigo...

me contabas tus historias,

me decías que querías dejar todo,

viajar lejos,

olvidar todo,

dejar tu cabello crecer y pintar a colores,

soñé contigo...

será otra vida?

la vida de los sueños

será un sueño esta vida?

••••••••

consecutive nights I dream of dreams...

I dream with you...

what messages are you sending me?

excerpt from my dream journal

trade in those medals

"You are a royal fish trying to wear pants in a country as foreign as land.

Now there's a problem worth discussing.

Your separation from God had ripened. Now fall like a golden fruit into my hand.

All your wounds from craving love exist because of heroic deeds.

Now trade in those medals; that courage will help this world.

One needs to love those they have yet to love to stand near the Friend.

Why be a royal fish trying to wear pants?

Hafiz, what are you talking about? Has something happened to good brilliant mind?" - HAFIZ

detail from mixed media on paper, circa 2007

the mystery of light

"The Healer" - circa 2008
my Tio Lou danced into the light early this morning with the full harvest moon

"You would know the secret of death.

But how shall you find it unless you seek it in the heart of life?

The owl whose night-bound eyes are blind unto the day cannot unveil the mystery of light.

If you would indeed behold the spirit of death, open your heart wide unto the body of life.

For life and death are one, even as the river and the sea are one.

In the depth of your hopes and desires lies your silent knowledge of the beyond;
And like seeds dreaming beneath the snow your heart dreams of spring.

Trust the dreams, for in them is hidden the gate to eternity.

Your fear of death is but the trembling of the shepherd when he stands before the king whose hand is to be laid upon him in honour.

Is the shepherd not joyful beneath his trembling, that he shall wear the mark of the king?

Yet is he not more mindful of his trembling?

For what is it to die but to stand naked in the wind and to melt into the sun?

And what is it to cease breathing, but to free the breath from its restless tides, that it may rise and expand and seek God unencumbered?

Only when you drink from the river of silence shall you indeed sing.

And when you have reached the mountain top, then you shall begin to climb.

And when the earth shall claim your limbs, then shall you truly dance."

- Kahlil Gibran

harvest moon

"Come a little bit closer

Hear what I have to say

Just like children sleeping

We could dream this night away

But there's a full moon rising

Let's go dancing in the light

We know where the music's playing

Let's go out and feel the night

Because I'm still in love with you

I want to see you dance again

Because I'm still in love with you

On this harvest moon

When we were strangers

I watched you from afar

When we were lovers

I loved you with all my heart

But now it's getting late

And the moon is climbing high

I want to celebrate

See it shining in your eyes

Because I'm still in love with you

I want to see you dance again

Because I'm still in love with you

On this harvest moon..."

- Neil Young

night breezes seem to whisper

Stars shining bright above you,

Night breezes seem to whisper "I love you"

Birds singing in the sycamore tree,
Dream a little dream of me.

Say "Night-ie night" and kiss me,

Just hold me tight and tell me you'll miss me.

While I'm alone and blue as can be,

Dream a little dream of me.

Stars fading, but I linger on, dear
Still craving your kiss
I'm longing to linger till dawn, dear
Just saying this

Sweet dreams till sunbeams find you
Sweet dreams that leave all worries behind you
But in your dreams whatever they be
Dream a little dream of me

Stars fading, but I linger on, dear
Still craving your kiss
I'm longing to linger till dawn, dear
Just saying this

Sweet dreams till sunbeams find you
Sweet dreams that leave all worries far behind you
But in your dreams whatever they be
Dream a little dream of me.."

Songwriters: Fabian Andre, Gus Kahn, and Wilbur Schwandt

un genio

mi bello abuelo de colonias y cuentos 

el que me enseño a dibujar 

a jugar con palabras 

a platicar con seguridad

a ser una verdadera pavo-real-la de plumas blancas y plateadas como las de las hadas

siempre impecable y notable

un genio genial y jovial de medallas y honores

el de mis amores

siento su mirada noche y día

escucho sus consejos

segura que nos encontramos en mis sueños

excerpt from my journals 

wild

"Her messy hair a visible attribute of her stubborn spirit.

As she shakes it free, she smiles knowing WILD is her favorite color."

- J. Iron Word

your taste

"still a little bit of your taste in my mouth

still a little bit of you laced with my doubt... 

still a little bit of your ghost - your witness  

still a little bit of your face I haven't kissed...  

still a little bit of your song in my ear, 

still a little bit of your words I long to hear..."

- Damien Rice

excerpt from my journals, mixed media on canvas