touched the perfect body with your mind

- 2013 mixed media on paper -

"Suzanne takes you down to her place near the river
You can hear the boats go by
You can spend the night beside her
And you know that she's half crazy
But that's why you want to be there
And she feeds you tea and oranges
That come all the way from China
And just when you mean to tell her
That you have no love to give her
Then she gets you on her wavelength 
And she lets the river answer 
That you've always been her lover 
And you want to travel with her 
And you want to travel blind 
And you know that she will trust you 
For you've touched her perfect body with your mind...

Now Suzanne takes your hand 
And she leads you to the river 
She is wearing rags and feathers 
From Salvation Army counters 
And the sun pours down like honey 
On our lady of the harbour 
And she shows you where to look 
Among the garbage and the flowers 
There are heroes in the seaweed 
There are children in the morning 
They are leaning out for love 
And they will lean that way forever 
While Suzanne holds the mirror 
And you want to travel with her 
And you want to travel blind 
And you know that you can trust her 
For she's touched your perfect body with her mind..."

- L. Cohen (circa 1967)

mindful cravings

I have been hungry since last night, craving sushi and ceviche. 

Raw fish cravings...I have even been lusting after a clandestine cigarette. I doubt mermaids smoke.

What is my soul craving?

What is my soul hungering for?

I bring the cravings to my yoga and meditation practice this morning. I sit and stretch with them, becoming more curious and compassionate through each breath...

the beginning of the beginning

- an image from my 2007 journals -

"Turning your mind toward the dharma does not bring security or confirmation.  Turning your mind toward the dharma does not bring any ground to stand on.  In fact, when your mind turns toward the dharma, you fearlessly acknowledge impermanence and change and begin to get the knack of hopelessness.

In Tibetan there's an interesting word: ye tang che.  The ye part means "totally, completely," and the rest of it means "exhausted." Altogether, ye tang che means totally tired out.  We might say "totally fed up."  It describes an experience of complete hopelessness, of completely giving up hope.  This is an important point.  This is the beginning of the beginning.  Without giving up hope -- that there's somewhere better to be, that there's someone better to be -- we will never relax with where we are now or who we are.

To think that we can finally get it all together is unrealistic.  To seek for some lasting security is futile. To undo our very ancient and very stuck habitual patterns of mind requires that we begin to turn around some of our most basic assumptions.  Believing in a solid, separate self, continuing to seek pleasure and avoid pain, thinking that someone "out there" is to blame for our pain -- one has to get totally fed up with these ways of thinking.  One has to give up hope that this way of thinking will bring us satisfaction.  Suffering begins to dissolve when we can question the belief or the hope that there's anywhere to hide." - Pema Chodron

I bring it all to my meditation mat: the numbness, the emptiness, the anxiety, the loss, the boredom, the grief, the gratitude, the joy, the laughter, the exhaustion...without judgement.  I sit and breathe and simply honor what is going on at the moment.  I am more than feelings and emotions.  I am more than thoughts.  I am more and yet I am nothing and everything.

...this is where I am on this delicious, rainy Monday morning...Om Shanthi...

frog medicine

- 2012 photograph taken in Costa Rica -

“Due to the fascinating transitions the Frog goes through in its life, it is a symbol of METAMORPHOSIS…the Frog’s dual time spent on land and water represents duality of the SOUL.  The Frog also symbolizes CREATIVITY and FORWARD THINKING.” – Avia Venefica

I have been having the strangest, most extraordinary dreams.  Each is layered with messages and symbolism. 

 

bajo el peso de un beso

- 2013 watercolor on paper -

Esto es amor, esto es amor, yo siento
en todo átomo vivo un pensamiento.

Yo soy una y soy mil, todas las vidas
pasan por mí, me muerden sus heridas.

Y no puedo ya más, en cada gota
de mi sangre hay un grito y una nota.

Y me doblo, me doblo bajo el peso
de un beso enorme, de un enorme beso.

- Alfonsina Storni

...bajo el peso de un beso...under the weight of a kiss...

el sabor de mis puntos cardinales

"Yo tuve un amor atlantico
y me converti en sirena
y en mi carne morena
sentí el calor
silbando fuerte a mi alrededor
y tuve un amor lunatico
y me converti en planeta
y estuvimos dando vueltas
en un baile silencioso
las estrellas calladas
como nosotros
y ahora tengo un amor
que es un calor
que navega su aire en el viento
que conoce mis buenos momentos, mis males
y el sabor de mis puntos cardinales
yo tuve un amor antártico
y la nieve me esperaba
noche y dia fría, helada
pero a mi no me importaba
porque el hielo conservaba nuestro ardor
y ahora tengo un amor
que es un calor
que navega su aire en el viento
que conoce mis buenos momentos, mis males
y el sabor de mis puntos cardinales..." - Ana Torroja

old friends

"Your heart and my heart are very, very old friends." - HAFIZ 

have you touched the center of your own sorrow?

"It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living.
I want to know what you ache for
and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing.

It doesn’t interest me how old you are.
I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool
for love
for your dream
for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring your moon...
I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow
if you have been opened by life’s betrayals
or have become shriveled and closed
from fear of further pain.

I want to know if you can sit with pain
mine or your own
without moving to hide it
or fade it
or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy
mine or your own
if you can dance with wildness
and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes
without cautioning us
to be careful
to be realistic
to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me
is true.
I want to know if you can
disappoint another
to be true to yourself.
If you can bear the accusation of betrayal
and not betray your own soul.
If you can be faithless
and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see Beauty
even when it is not pretty
every day.
And if you can source your own life
from its presence.

I want to know if you can live with failure
yours and mine
and still stand at the edge of the lake
and shout to the silver of the full moon,
“Yes.”

It doesn’t interest me
to know where you live or how much money you have.
I want to know if you can get up
after the night of grief and despair
weary and bruised to the bone
and do what needs to be done
to feed the children.

It doesn’t interest me who you know
or how you came to be here.
I want to know if you will stand
in the center of the fire
with me
and not shrink back.

It doesn’t interest me where or what or with whom
you have studied.
I want to know what sustains you
from the inside
when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone
with yourself
and if you truly like the company you keep
in the empty moments."

© Oriah Mountain Dreamer from the book "The Invitation"

a reminder to be true to myself, to my dreams, to my art...

intimacy

"When was the last time you wallowed in contentment, maybe lay in bed for two days just making your lover sigh and giggle, and she/he and you talked silliness for hours and joked at the sweet insignificance of most all stuff?

Cuddle up with the stars more. You will be able to do that if you can start treating every human being as a sacred cow, and keep a few of my poems handy." - my beloved HAFIZ

cuddle up with stars...cuddle up with dreams...cuddle up with ideas...cuddle up with questions...cuddle up with mysteries...

become intimate with every inch of the soul...

así como cambio yo...pero no cambia mi amor

- detail from my studio -

Cambia lo superficial
Cambia también lo profundo
Cambia el modo de pensar
Cambia todo en este mundo

Cambia el clima con los años
Cambia el pastor su rebaño
Y así como todo cambia
Que yo cambie no es extraño

Cambia el más fino brillante
De mano en mano su brillo 
Cambia el nido el pajarillo 
Cambia el sentir un amante 

Cambia el rumbo el caminante 
Aunque esto le cause daño 
Y así como todo cambia 
Que yo cambie no es extraño 

Cambia, todo cambia 
Cambia, todo cambia 

Cambia el sol en su carrera 
Cuando la noche subsiste 
Cambia la planta y se viste 
De verde en la primavera 

Cambia el pelaje la fiera 
Cambia el cabello el anciano 
Y así como todo cambia 
Que yo cambie no es extraño 

Pero no cambia mi amor 
Por mas lejos que me encuentre 
Ni el recuerdo ni el dolor 
De mi tierra y de mi gente 

Y lo que cambió ayer 
Tendrá que cambiar mañana 
Así como cambio yo 
En esta tierra lejana. 

- Julio Numhauser 

new moon blessings

"Chaos should be regarded as extremely good news."

- Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche

the only constant is change...are we able to surrender to uncertainty?

embracing chaos on this new moon that is ushering in new ideas, new insights and new beginnings...

raining romance

- signed bronze bangles - wearable sculpture - those are my fingerprints -

I adore rainy days.  The skies are mysterious and gray.  Everything is wet.  I love the sound, scent and taste of Mother Nature's blessed waters.

"Rain is grace; rain is the sky descending to the earth; without rain, there would be no life."

- John Updike

pintando alma

- 2013 mixed media on canvas from a series
exploring painting as poetry and meditation -

detrás de una hoja azul

se encuentra la mujer 

vestida de blanco 

pintando su alma 

detrás de una hoja azul

evolution

- mixed media on paper in sepia -

"Whatever relationships you have attracted in your life at this moment, are precisely the ones you need in your life at this moment. There is a hidden meaning behind all events, and this hidden meaning is serving your own evolution.”
- Deepak Chopra

la mama loba

- mixed media created after a dream -

"Wolves and women are relational by nature, inquiring, possessed of great endurance and strength.  They are deeply intuitive, intensely concerned with their young, their mate and their pack.  Yet both have been hounded, harassed and falsely imputed to be devouring and devious, overly aggressive, of less value than those who are their detractors." - C. Pinkola Estes

disassembled by her

- memento from my days living in Italia -

"He sweeps his arm across plates and glasses on a restaurant table so she might look up somewhere else in the city hearing this cause of noise.  When he is without her.  He, who has never felt alone in the miles of longitude between desert towns...He lies in his room surrounded by the pale maps.  He is without Katherine.  His hunger wishes to burn down all social rules, all courtesy.  Her life with others no longer interests him.  He wants only her stalking beauty, her theatre of expressions.  He wants the minute and secret reflection between them, the depth of field minimal, their foreignness intimate like two pages of a closed book.  He has been disassembled by her..." - Michael Ondaatje

heal my heart

- mixed media from a series -

"She Who Heals:

Mother, sing me a song

That will ease my pain,

Mend broken bones,

Bring wholeness again.



Catch my babies

When they are born,

Sing my death song,

Teach me how to mourn.



Show me the Medicine

Of the healing herbs,

The value of spirit,

The way I can serve.



Mother, heal my heart

So that I can see

The gifts of yours

That can live through me."

- Jamie Sams

breath by breath

"I can tell you that what you're looking for is already inside you." - Anne Lamott

what is your soul whispering?

become silent, breath by breath and listen...

waves of labor, sorrow and bliss

waves,

my body moves in waves

when I dance...even when I walk sometimes...

waves of laughter...waves of grief...waves of waves

"I love waves; I wish I had some in my hair. My daddy did, but I guess I didn't dive into that end of the gene pool. Virginia Woolf wrote my favorite book, The Waves, and I have a son who surfs them. I danced a thousand dances to Patti Smith's song "Wave" and I've waved a thousand good-byes. I've seen waves come and take my house, flood the same bedroom where they accompanied countless nights of lovemaking. I have ridden the waves of labor, of sorrow, and of bliss."
- GABRIELLE ROTH

originally published in November 2007

riding waves of waves...I am learning to surf...

earth and stars

Be humble for you are made of earth.
Be noble for you are made of stars.
- SERBIAN PROVERB



mother nature giving us spring

- 2013 mixed media from series -

She stirs. 
She moans lightly with delight.
Her lips curve up into a smile.
Her eyes begin to open.
She is waking up.
Mother Nature is waking up and giving us Spring.

from my 2007 journals

tigers and strawberries

- mixed media on paper from my journals -

“There is a story of a woman running away from tigers. She runs and runs and the tigers are getting closer and closer. When she comes to the edge of a cliff, she sees some vines there, so she climbs down and holds on to the vines. Looking down, she sees that there are tigers below her as well. She then notices that a mouse is gnawing away at the vine to which she is clinging. She also sees a beautiful little bunch of strawberries close to her, growing out of a clump of grass. She looks up and she looks down. She looks at the mouse. Then she just takes a strawberry, puts it in her mouth, and enjoys it thoroughly. Tigers above, tigers below. This is actually the predicament that we are always in, in terms of our birth and death. Each moment is just what it is. It might be the only moment of our life; it might be the only strawberry we’ll ever eat. We could get depressed about it, or we could finally appreciate it and delight in the preciousness of every single moment of our life.” 
― Pema Chödrön

woman, hold me close to your heart

- mixed media on paper -

"Woman, I know you understand,
The little child inside the man,
Please remember my life is in your hands,
And Woman, hold me close to your heart,
However distant, don’t keep us apart,
After all, it is written in the stars…"
... - John Lennon (1940-1980)

a bit of Irish luck

- 2013 mixed media on paper -

May your day be touched
by a bit of Irish luck,
brightened by a song in your heart,
and warmed by the smiles
of the people you love.
- Irish Blessing

mother courage

- mixed media on paper -

"I've been through it all, baby, I'm Mother Courage."
- Elizabeth Taylor (1932-2011)

do you believe in prayer?

- mixed media on paper -

"I believe in prayer..."
- Josephine Baker (1906-1975)

nostalgia de mi Nicaragua

- mixed media on paper -

"Si bien fue muy provechosa mi estancia en NY, sentía la nostalgia de mi Nicaragua. Me hacían falta desde las brisas del lago hasta el sonido de sus campanas."- Edith Grön (1917-1990)

mi Nicaragua...

the man who can thrill you

- mixed media on paper in a private collection -

“The real lover is the man who can thrill you by kissing your forehead or smiling into your eyes or just staring into space.” 
- Marilyn Monroe

to be a free spirit

- mixed media on paper -

"I like to be a free spirit. Some don't like that, but that's the way I am."
-Diana Spencer, Princess of Wales (1961-1997)

to improve

- mixed media on paper -

"How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world."
- Anne Frank (1929-1945)

the whole world

- mixed media on paper -

"As a woman, I have no country.

As a woman, I want no country.

As a woman my country is the whole world."

- Virginia Woolf

open up to belonging to the whole world...

so many doors

- mixed media on paper -

"I feel very adventurous. There are so many doors to be opened, and I'm not afraid to look behind them."
- Elizabeth Taylor (1932-2011)

so many doors...

International Women's Day

- mixed medias on paper -

"I believe that within me lies an extraordinary radiance, and I commit to letting my light loose in the world.

I believe that the source of my power and wisdom is in the center of my being, and I commit to acting from this place of strength.

I believe that I possess an abundance of passion and creative potential, and I commit to the expression of these gifts.

I believe that the time has come to let go of old notions and unhealthy attitudes, and I commit to re-examine what I have been told about beauty and dismiss what insults my soul.

I believe that negative thoughts and words compromise my well-being, and I commit to thinking and speaking positively about myself and others.

I believe that young women are in need of positive role models, and I commit to being an example of authenticity and self-love.

I believe in the relationship between my well-being and the well-being of the planet, and I commit to a life of mindfulness that regards all living things as holy and worthy of my love.

I believe it is my spiritual responsibility to care for my body with respect, kindness and compassion.  I commit to balancing my life in such a way that my physical being is fully expressed and nurtured.

I believe that joy is an essential part of wellness, and I commit to removing obstacles to joy and creating a life that is full of exuberance.

I believe that a woman who loves herself is a powerful, passionate, attractive force, and I commit, from this day forward, to loving myself deeply and extravagantly."

- Jan Phillips, Copyright 2007

for all of the women

- 2008 mixed medias -

"Imagine a woman who believes it is right and good she is a woman.

A woman who honors her experience and tells her stories.

Who refuses to carry the sins of others within her body and life.

Imagine a woman who trusts and respects herself.

A woman who listens to her needs and desires.

Who meets them with tenderness and grace.

Imagine a woman who acknowledges the past's influence on the present.

A woman who has walked through her past.

Who has healed into the present.

Imagine a woman who authors her own life.

A woman who exerts, initiates, and moves on her own behalf.

Who refuses to surrender except to her truest self and wisest voice.

Imagine a woman who names her own gods.

A woman who imagines the divine in her image and likeness.

Who designs a personal spirituality to inform her daily life.

Imagine a woman in love with her own body.

A woman who believes her body is enough, just as it is.

Who celebrates its rhythms and cycles as an exquisite resource.

Imagine a woman who honors the body of the Goddess in her changing body.

A woman who celebrates the accumulation of her years and her wisdom.

Who refuses to use her life-energy disguising the changes in her body and life.

Imagine a woman who values the women in her life.

A woman who sits in circles of women.

Who is reminded of the truth about herself when she forgets.

Imagine yourself as this woman."

“Imagine a Woman” © Patricia Lynn Reilly, 1995

face the truth

- mixed media on paper -

"Risk! Risk anything! Care no more for the opinions of others, for those voices. Do the hardest thing on earth for you. Act for yourself. Face the truth." - Katherine Mansfield (1888-1923)

what is the hardest thing on earth for you?

what is your truth?

what is your relationship to risk?

how do the opinions of others affect you?

40 days in silence

What are you willing to give up for 40 days? Are you able to do so in silence, without needing to tell the world about it? Without complaining?

 

the paintings are 2014 mixed media on canvas, still in progress...

dare to be powerful

- mixed media on paper -

"When I dare to be powerful -- to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid."
- Audré Lorde (1934-1992)

how do we block our expression?

- mixed media on paper -

"There is a vitality, a life-force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and be lost."
- Martha Graham (1894-1991)

how do we block ourselves?

how do we block our expression?

why would we do this to our souls?

we are on this planet to DANCE our DREAMS into realities...we are ALIVE so that we can stretch and grow and learn and laugh and cry and express the beauty that is within us...

mothers to a new world

"Women must remember the sacred nature of our Goddess self, the call to glory inherent in human incarnation.  We are daughters of history and mothers to a new world.  This is not the time to throw away our power.  It is time to claim it, in the name of love."
- Marianne Williamson

dare to discover

- mixed media on paper -

"A woman has got to be able to say, and not feel guilty, 'Who am I, and what do I want out of life?' She mustn't feel selfish and neurotic if she wants goals of her own, outside of husband and children."
- Betty Friedan (1921-2006)

Who are you?

What do you want out of life?

Stop feeling guilty.
You have done the best you can.
No regrets.

Live your life today, this moment...on this NEW MOON, dare to discover who you are...