my Cuban grandmother

“…If you would indeed behold the spirit of death, open your heart wide unto the body of life.  For life and death are one, even as the river and sea are one…For what is it to die but to stand naked in the wind and to melt into the sun?  And what is it to cease breathing, but to free the breath from its restless tides, that it may rise and expand and seek God unencumbered?  Only when you drink from the river of silence shall you indeed sing.  And when you have reached the mountain top, then you shall begin to climb.  And when the earth shall claim your limbs, then shall you truly dance.”         – Kahlil Gibran (1883-1931)

my beautiful and beloved Cuban grandmother...I close my eyes and hear your contagious cascading waterfall laughter showering us with stardust blessings of light...

nuevos himnos lenguas de gloria

Salutación Del Optimista: 

"Inclitas razas ubérrimas, sangre de Hispania fecunda, espíritus fraternos, luminosas almas, salve! Porque llega el momento en que habrán de cantar nuevos himnos lenguas de gloria..." 

- Rubén Darío

my father played his guitar

serenading his beloved motherland

Nicaragua

my youngest brother

turned 21 today

snapshot of my beloved son

an integral being

"An integral being knows without going, sees without looking, and accomplishes without doing."

-Lao Tzu

beauty and courage

"Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love."

- Rainier Maria Rilke

mixed media on paper, 2011

destiny

"You are what your deep, driving desire is. As your desire is, so is your will. As your will is, so is your deed. As your deed is, so is your destiny."

- Brihadaranyaka Upanishad 

snapshot: what do you see?

crystals...diamonds...

salt...sugar...

it is actually glass...broken glass...a pile of broken glass viles from an installation by artist Shana Lutker

messages

"It's not your fault but it is your responsibility."

- Joe Vitale

"My job here on earth is twofold. My job is first of all to make amends. My second job is to awaken people who might be asleep. Almost everyone is asleep! The only way I can awaken them is to work on myself." 

- Ihaleakala Hew Len

Ka Maluhia no na wa a pau, no ke'ia wa a mau a mau loa aku.

telling my story

- circa mid-1970s - Rehoboth Beach, Delaware -

The beach holds memories of sand castles and salty smiles. It is where I need to begin telling my story, telling her story...with Father Sun and Mother Moon...

excerpt from my journals

to arrive at a kiss

- 2013 mixed media on canvas in a private collection -

"Amor, cuantos caminos hasta llegar a un beso, que soledad errante hasta tu compañía!" 

- Pablo Neruda

"Love, what a long way, to arrive at a kiss, what loneliness-in-motion, toward your company!" 

- Pablo Neruda translated by Stephen Tapscott

no tengo tiempo para quererte más

"Paso que pasa -

rostro que pasabas -

que más quieres -

te miro -

después me olvidare -

después y sólo -

sólo y después -

seguro que me olvido.

Paso que pasas -

rostro que pasabas -

que más quieres -

te quiero -

te quiero sólo dos -

o tres minutos -

para quererte más -

no tengo tiempo.

Paso que pasas -

rostro que pasabas -

ay no -

ay no me tientes -

que sí nos tentamos -

no nos podremos olvidar -

adiós."

- Mario Benedetti 

tired of speaking sweetly

my beloved HAFIZ counsels:

"Love wants to reach out and manhandle us, break all our teacup talk of God.

If you had the courage and could give the Beloved His choice, some nights He would just drag you around the room by your hair, ripping your grip all those toys in the world that bring you no joy.

Love sometimes gets tired of speaking sweetly and wants do rip to shreds all your erroneous notions of truth that make you fight within yourself, dear one, and with others, causing the world to weep on too many fine days.

God wants to manhandle us, lock us inside of a tiny room with Himself and practice His dropkick.

The Beloved sometimes wants to do us a great favor: hold us upside down and shake all the nonsense out.

But when we hear He is in such a 'playful drunken mood' - most everyone I know quickly packs their bags and hightails out of town." - HAFIZ

what do you think of this?

I laugh and love...and can identify with the Beloved at times...

the letting go

" you are snakeskin 

and i keep shedding you somehow 

my mind is forgetting 

every exquisite detail 

of your face 

the letting go has 

become the forgetting 

which is the most 

pleasant and saddest thing 

to have happened "

- rupi kaur

snapshot of a tree

my story - HERstory

"A story is medicine that greases and hoists the pulleys, shows us the way out, down, in and around, cuts for us fine wide doors in previously blank walls, doors which lead us to our own knowing."

- C. Pinkola Estes

volcanoes melt me down

- mixed media -

"...and what I am to you is not real,
what I am to you, you do not need,
what I am to you is not what you mean to me,
you give me miles and miles of mountains,
and I'll ask for the sea.

don't throw yourself like that,
in front of me.
I kissed your mouth, your back,
is that all you need?
don't drag my love around,
volcanoes melt me down.

...what I give to you is just what I'm going through,
there is nothing new, no, no just another phase of finding,
what I really need is what makes me bleed...

I kissed your mouth,
you do not need me."

- Damien Rice

ya no sé si maldecirte o por ti rezar

- mixed media on paper in a private collection -

"Ya me canso de llorar y no amanece -
Ya no sé si maldecirte o por ti rezar -
Tengo miedo de buscarte y de encontrarte -
Donde me aseguran mis amigos que te vas -
Hay momentos en que quisiera mejor rajarme -
Y arrancarme ya los clavos de mi penar -
Pero mis ojos se mueren sin mirar tus ojos -
Y mi cariño con la aurora te vuelve a esperar -

Y agarraste por tu cuenta la parranda -
Paloma negra, paloma negra ¿dónde, dónde andarás?
Ya no jueges con mi honra parrandera -
Si tus caricias han de ser mías, de nadie más -
Y aunque te amo con locura ya no vuelva -
Paloma negra eres la reja de un penar -
Quiero ser libre vivir mi vida con quien yo quiera -
Díos dame fuerza que me estoy muriendo,
por irla a buscar..."

- as sung by Chavela Vargas

simplemente soy: Frida Kahlo

- sterling silver, silk, turquoise and vintage coral necklace (circa 2006) on top of  a mixed media on wood (circa 2009) -

"Me importa una mierda lo que piense el mundo. Yo nací puta, yo nací pintora, yo nací jodida. Pero fui feliz en mi camino. Tu no entiendes lo que soy. Yo soy amor, soy placer, soy esencia, soy una idiota, soy una alcohólica, soy tenaz. Yo soy; simplemente soy..." - Frida Kahlo

the tree swing

barefoot on the wet grass 

I ask him to lend me the swing 

will the tall branch hold me? 

up to 700 pounds 

I slide on 

I balance myself with ease 

please push me 

higher

faster

flying

my hair, wild in the wind

laughter

am I really almost over the fence?

seeing the world upside down

I love the tree swing

I feel 7 years old

carefree

when was the last time you gave in to your inner child?

when was the last time you played?

independence

- mixed media on paper -

"Independence is happiness." - Susan B. Anthony (1820-1906)

freedom

self-determination

autonomy

liberty

kissing me

- 2013 mixed media on canvas -

"Nothing can shatter this love.

For even if you took another

into your arms,

the truth is,

my sweetheart,

you would

still be kissing me." 

- my beloved HAFIZ (who else?)

the universe conspires

"Once you make a decision, the Universe conspires to make it happen."

- Ralph Waldo Emerson

I made a decision. I made a promise to my soul, a commitment with my spirit...

luna disfrazada

una luna llena

melancólica

llora luz dorada

el sufrimiento en silencio

no me ve

pero no deja de mirarme

por el espejo de su alma

con la mente me llama

en los sueños me encuentra

esa luna llena 

triste 

disfrazada de sonrisas